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Joke of the Day

"I bet the worst part about being a birthday cake is when you're set on fire, and then eaten by the hero that saved you."

"Two condoms are walking down the street... ...they pass a gay bar and one turns to the other and says, ""wanna go in there and get shitfaced?"""

"You and I share a very special connection. *I'm parked outside your house using your Wi-fi."

"Two blondes are in geography class together... One asks the other ""Which is closer, London or the moon"" The other replies ""The moon, obviously, can you see London?"""

"Following my vasectomy my urologist told me to return with a sample after I had ejaculated 40 times Ok Doc. See you tomorrow morning!"

"What did the father lightning bolt do to his son when he miabehaved? He grounded him."

"How do you circumcise a West Virginian man? Punch his sister in the throat."

"I've never had a beard before this one and I didnt like it at first. But its really growing on me."

"Why do the horses hate the jockey? Because he's a horse racist."

"Don't be sad dirty dishes, nobody's doing me either."