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Joke of the Day

"Why do cars slow down when they see a cop has pulled someone over? HE'S A LITTLE BUSY TO WORRY ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW DUMMIES"

"A shout out to all of the beautiful women who don't need to dress trashy to attract a man..... But party at my place for all those who do"

"Women would be better serial killers if they didn't smile when people mention someone's been missing"

"ST BERNARD DOG: [getting ready for work] Honey have you seen my barrel? WIFE: Which one? SBD: The little one I wear AROUND MY NECK EVERY DAY"

"My girlfriend used Vaseline on a handjob today. I came three times in the shower trying to wash it off."

"What did the cheese say to itself in the in the mirror? halloumi"

"Justin Bieber and Ke$ha has sex and gave birth to Rebecca Black."

"I once saw a midget goalie play 10 consecutive games in a row. After the games I asked if he was sore, and he said ""I'm a little tender""."

"You can tune a piano.. You can tune a piano, but you can't tunafish"

"What do giraffes eat at 11am? Brunch."