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Joke of the Day

"Before I lose my phone, end up naked, high, drunk and/or possibly arrested, I would like to wish all a Happy Saturday!"

"My husband hits me whenever I tell a joke. He doesn't strike me as the funny type."

"What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent feat. Nickelback Go ahead, down vote me to oblivion Edit: thanks for all the love, appreciated"

"Three men are on a boat. They have four cigarettes, but nothing to light them with. So they throw a cigarette overboard and the whole boat becomes one cigarette lighter."

"My Mexican friend was freaking out, but I couldn't understand his panic."

"Which band does feminists hate the most? Cis-tem of a Down"

"|(O)| MAARCOOO! ...... (.){"

"I don't always give women orgasms, but when I do... I let them swallow."

"I would never buy a plastic 3D printed car Unless it came with ABS."

"How often do you guys close your internet tabs? One of mine is from the Kerry/Edwards campaign."