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Joke of the Day

"Might buy a junkyard just to grow my own junk food."

"[several months ago] BEYONCE: Kim Kardashian might be having a 3RD baby JAY-Z: How many we got BEYONCE: One JAY-Z: Not a problem"

"Dance like no one's a werewolf. Eat like you found it in the couch. Shout like your cat's sleeping. Feel good like a bossy poem told you to."

"Jesus walks into a bar No he didn't, because he isn't real."

"What did Moses say when Isaiah told him the levy had burst? God Dam It!"

"G.O.T. joke: ""What's better than a Grape, Robb?"" ""A Raisin, Bran."

"Darth Vader, you are the father! --Star Wars cast on the set of Maury"

"What did Little Red Riding Hoods boyfriend say when he was asked about their sex life? It's all good in the Hood!"

"If he can't build a wall, Trump is going to dig a giant hole at the border and cover it with a welcome mat like it's a Road Runner cartoon."

"I watched her squeeze into the booth, finish 3 Egg McMuffins, & stand-up. ""My knees are killing me, it must be the cold weather,"" she said."