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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a sapling in the military? An Infantry! (Infant tree, a sapling is a baby/young tree? Ah forget it!)"

"What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breathe, you idiot, breathe!!!!"

"[on a Speed date] pop quiz hotshot, if this date goes below 50 mph it explodes [her] that makes no sense [I mouth a tiny explosion sound]"

"HIM: You know what we should do at our wedding reception? [at the same time] ME: Murder-suicide HIM: The chicken dance!"

"why i call my girlfriend warm beer my girlfriend asked me why i sometimes call her warm beer, i told her very few want her sober but while drunk shes fair game."

"Dark humor? Is slightly darker humor acceptable for this sub? Just wondering..."

"The sun will come out tomorrow, and unfortunately so will other people."

"What do you call an old skeleton's jokes? *Dry humer!*"

"What do you call a man who repeatedly stabs his raisin bran on a daily basis? A cereal killer"

"My grandfather died during the Holocaust. Fell right out of the guard tower."