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Joke of the Day

"I wish the dude that jogs around my neighborhood all day would wear a Super Mario costume. And occasionally duck into sewers."

"""Oh hello, I didn't see you there!"" - Translation: I have failed to avoid you"

"This morning I saw a homeless guy talking to his shadow... Does that mean six more weeks of recession?"

"How many dragon Ball z characters does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but it'll take at least 6 episodes!"

"All I'm saying is, China could have a much better relationship with the West if they shared their dragons with us but whatever be that way."

"Why didn't Michael J Fox order food at McDonalds? He got the shakes instead."

"Hillary's So Crooked.... Hillary's So Crooked She Needs A Kaine!"

"My coworker said he enjoyed his recent trip to Port-au-Prince. I guess you could say he has a love/Haiti relationship."

"George Washington: We should put 'We trust in God' on our money Thomas Jefferson: Great idea. Did you get that? Yoda (taking notes): Yep"

"I'm not into bestiality but... I do like hot dogs"