112567

Joke of the Day

"I routinely take 8 flights of stairs for no other reason than to avoid idle chit chat in the elevator. See, hating people can be healthy!"

"What do you get if you cross a skunk and a cartoon penguin? Pingu-Pong!"

"How do you tell the difference between members of the GOP and ISIS? Skin color."

"Chuck Norris drinks napalm to quell his heartburn."

"- Are you even listening to me? - Of course I am - Ok, what did I just ask you? - If I'm listening to you"

"Sigmond called. He must be a cross dresser, because he wants his slip back."

"Why might Saturn's rings come loose? They're too close to Titan."

"""I want my country back"" is a fair and accurate thing to say if at one point in your life you owned the country."

"Did you hear there was a nuclear explosion in space this morning?! Most people call it the sun. Note: My dad pulled this on me this morning. My friend hit me when I told them."

"What's long and stylish and full of cats? The Easter Purrade!"