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Joke of the Day

"How do you tell the difference between a Sunni and a Shiite Muslim? The Sunni's are the ones with the Shiite blown out of them."

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"If Mr. Bigger has a baby, which one is bigger? The baby is, he's just a little Bigger."
"My son just told me he's changing his clock to military time so he can stay up later. He is not a smart boy."
"A news reporter introduces his new co-worker on air This Justin"
"Karen on Facebook says, ""2014 is going sooooo well!"" Personally, I've already fcuked up 2014, and a good chunk of 2015, so go fcuk yourself Karen."
"What is 6 afraid of 7? Because size matters."
"How do you subdue a large snake? You use a boa restrictor"
"wife: its ruining date night me: its ruining date night because you're letting it ruin date night hitchhiker: just drop me off on the corner"
"Flashing my Costco card at the lady at the entrance is the closest I'll ever get to feeling like I'm on the VIP list at the clubs."
"God is obviously a Civil Engineer... ... Only a civil engineer would route a sewage system through a playground."
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