111289

Joke of the Day

"9 out of 10 Americans agree ...that out of 10 Americans, one American will always disagree with the other nine."

"Have you heard about ISIS's new inflatable sex dolls They blow themselves up."

"She buys me a lot of shitty music these days. ""Reminds me of your old stuff,"" she says. So maybe I get her a gift subscription to Playboy."

"What's the difference between water and gasoline? In Flint Michigan you can get gasoline that is unleaded."

"I'd kick you in the vagina..... ...but I am afraid I would lose my shoe."

"I don't like how far I have to scroll down when I enter my birth year online."

"I'll never reveal my secrets. Alcohol: Lol."

"Women should be like a well placed rug You should be able to lay them then leave them"

"I've just heard that Harrison Ford crashed his plane onto a golf course Apparently he was just dropping in for a Short Round"

"When a guy flirts with me I start blushing uncontrollably and I hide. Then I wait for them outside their house wearing a wedding dress."