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Joke of the Day

"When a guy flirts with me I start blushing uncontrollably and I hide. Then I wait for them outside their house wearing a wedding dress."

"What's a Redditor's favorite food? Copy pasta! ^^I'm ^^so ^^sorry"

"Marriage is a three ring circus... Engagement ring, wedding ring, suffer-ring"

"Funny teacher responses to ""Can I go to the bathroom?"" Forget the classic ""I don't know, can you?"""

"Messy people must see reality shows differently They must see shows like ""hoarders"" as people with a bunch of cool stuff and douche bags throwing it away"

"The best part about having a homeless girlfriend? After the date, you can just drop her off anywhere."

"I wanted to get a second dog to keep my dog company. I asked my dog if he wanted me to bring him a male dog or a female dog. He replied... ""Bitch, please""."

"Whats the greediest nut? a cashjew"

"I'm all for people, places, and things. I guess you could say I am pronouns."

"I've started to take the SJW movement seriously and have applied it to my parenting style It's why I'm ignoring all my 10-month olds privileged white male tears."