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Joke of the Day

"""Why do people get plastic surgery? Why can't you just admit that it's over? Stop trying to look fuckable in your 50's."" @MaleHonesty86"

"How do bulls drive their cars? They steer them!"

"What is colder than the dwarf planet Pluto? Legal judgements against fathers"

"""Honey, I think I lost weight!"" ""Get on the scale, I bet you'll find it."""

"Apple is going to release the first smart vacuum cleaner this year The first Apple product that doesn't suck (not hating on apple or anything but i got this joke somewhere)"

"Twitter should offer Shkreli his account back for $10,000 and if he agrees say sorry and suddenly raise the price 5600%"

"I wrote a song about tortilla's Well. It's more of a wrap."

"How many kids with ADD does it take to change a lightbulb? YOU WANNA GO RIDE BIKES??"

"Why should you separate something into 62 parts if you want to make it tiny? Because sixty-seconds=minute."

"Rape Such a short word for such a long sentence."