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Joke of the Day

"If you do not eat your candy corn in three separate bites, starting from the big yellow end to the small white end, I hate you."

"If you're able to read this, thank a teacher! If you can do busy work while wasted and watch an unrelated video, thank a substitute teacher!"

"What did Jesus say to the Mexicans? Don't do anything until I get back"

"You know the Amish are people of simple values but did you know they are some of the most sexual people? .... It's true, their women require at least 2 Mennonite!"

"The United States ruined Hiroshima. Which American city did Japan ruin? Detroit"

"Met a girl named Gravity She was down to earth..."

"There are two kinds of people in this world: Those who require closure..."

"Why are white prisoners scarier than black prisoners? The white guy might actually be guilty. (Stolen from a comment by /u/CanadianWildlifeDept)"

"Warning, offensive. Why was Hitler so concerned about getting into heaven? Because there were 6 million jews waiting for him in hell."

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Cookie ! Cookie who ? Cookie quit and now I have to make all the food !"