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Joke of the Day

"If your parachute doesn't deploy... You have the rest of your life to fix it."

"""So, you speak German?"" ""NEIN!"""

"Baby, you make my floppy disk turn into a hard drive"

"Did you hear they removed the essay portion from the SAT? Now it's just called the T"

"When I was at school, the school bully used to make me rub my head against a giant piece of sandpaper. I was no match for him."

"Q: Why did the boy throw his clock out the window? A: He wanted to see time fly."

"I was gonna make a chemistry joke Then i realized all the good ones argon."

"A couple just married were happy with the whole thing. He was happy with the hole and she was happy with the thing."

"[boardroom] ""Now hear me out. They're Teenage.."" Ok ""Mutant.."" I like where this is going ""Ninja.."" Noun me, Graham! ""Turtles"" You're fired"

"What's the funniest joke you know? (Here's one of mine) Two flies were arguing on a toilet seat. One got pissed off."