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Joke of the Day

"Just been to the gym and there's a new machine there. I only used it for about an hour, as I started to feel sick, but it's great: it's got KitKats, Mars bars, crisps and everything in it"

Next Joke
 
"Wanna hear a joke? Western Feminism."
"What did the Italian say to his grandmother with alzheimer's? fugetaboutit!"
"What is the speed limit for sex? 68 . Because at 69 you flip over and eat it."
"I'm about 20% more confident when chewing gum."
"Why was the Egyptian boy confused? His daddy was really a mummy."
"This midlife crisis has a lot less bank heists and high speed car chases than I had imagined."
"Kristen gave Sally 3 flowers and 2 stuffed animals. Todd gave Sally 5 flowers and 3 stuffed animals. What does Sally have? Cancer."
"Too bad the dinosaurs didn't have a Bruce Willisaurus to fly into space and blow that asteroid up."
"I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice. Well, I think she was poor. She only had 1.30 in her purse."