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Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris wanted to make jokes great again So he bought a trumpet for every time we make an horrible pun."

"The British are coming! Get ready! Oh wait they're coming by boat. We have like three months"

"A cop pulled me over and said ""papers"" I said ""scissors, I win!"" and drove off."

"Did you hear about the Italian husband who was talking during his sleep? He ended up giving his wife a black eye"

"Did you hear about that guy who got the entire left side of his body cut off? Yeah but he is all right now"

"A Liberian man has 1 pie and shares half with his friend, what does he now have? Ebola, most likely."

"What do you call a banana with a penis dildonic"

"I forgot to pay my bill to the exorcist and so I got re-possesed."

"Me: ""If only the man upstairs could have blessed you with brains as well as beauty."" Wife: ""Why the hell is there a man upstairs?"""

"One of my friend told me that she got accepted at Dalhousie University... I told her to stay away from the dentistry students"