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Joke of the Day

"[alligator store] Clerk: $1500. Thanks Me: not gonna say bye to him? Clerk: uh Me: say it Clerk: goodbye Me: say ""see you later alligator"""

"Where can you go on Reddit to ask questions? Not /r/movies."

"Why was the Redditor's picture crooked? Because Redditors aren't known for keeping a level head."

"Can a woman turn a man into a millionaire? Yes, if he's a billionaire..."

"I had tears in my eyes when my dad chopped up Onions I loved Onions. He was a great dog."

"I will straight up walk into traffic to avoid a kid selling something."

"what happens if you drink 3.14 liters of water? you will Pi ss"

"What's the difference between a BMW and a porcupine? The porcupine has pricks on the outside Sorry but after seeing about 5 reposts today, I thought it was open season."

"Just a hipster joke passing by... Why did the hipster burn his hand? Because he touched the heater before it was cool."

"It's so cold outside I saw a politician with his hands in his own pockets."