108134
Joke of the Day
"Where do police put their drinks? Copholders"
Next Joke
"CW: What's for lunch; smells good! Me: Well I made lasagna last night but lost a fingernail in it & haven't found it yet. CW: Me: *smirks*"
"Two guys are walking down the street when they see a dog licking his balls. The first guy says, ""Man, I wish I could do that. The second guy says, ""Pet him, maybe he'll let you."""
"What do you say to encourage someone who is masturbating? You do you!"
"Sticks and stones may break your bones. Also good: lead pipes."
"[Gameshow] Host: ""You are one question away from our grand prize. How do you feel?"" Me: ""With my hands."" Host: ""Correct!"" *crowd goes nuts*"
"Me: hey girl r u an earthquake Her: aw bc I rock ur world? Me: no bc your unpredictability threatens the entire foundation of my existence"
"I haven't seen the democrats this mad at republicans... ... Since they freed the slaves"
"I crossed the road, walked into the bar and changed a lightbulb. It was at that moment I realised my life was a joke."
"Comas can really change the meaning of a sentence. For example: ""Ben is in a hurry"" ""Ben is in a coma"""