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Joke of the Day

"Me: what are we doing today Trainer: let work on your forearms. Me: but I only have 2 T: What?!? Me: *whispers* I only have 2?"

"What do Nazis drink for breakfast? Orange Jews."

"Doctor: It looks like you're pregnant Woman: I'm pregnant? Doctor: No it just looks like you are"

"Where did I get my scarf? It's a CVS receipt. You love it? Oh thank you very much."

"How do you steal a coat? You jacket."

"For as long as I remember I've always had amnesia."

"Every time my dentist is kind enough to tell me I need to floss, I am kind enough to tell him that he needs to trim his nostril hairs."

"Finally saw ""The Price Is Right"" with the new host. Maybe it's the glasses, but Drew Barrymore looks really different."

"I was going to tell a time travel joke... but you didn't like it."

"What do Gingers and Extinct Dinosaurs have in common? Not enough"""