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Joke of the Day

"An interesting fact about owls. Their heads can rotate up to 360 degrees before it comes off in your hand."

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"I'm not saying she's a whore... But if you threw her out a window she'd be deep penetrated[.](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defenestration)"
"There's something about curling... ... that rubs me the wrong way."
"I used to have a great job as a lifeguard, until this blue kid got me fired."
"I'm trying to give up sexual innuendos, but it's so hard..."
"Doesn't get paid: has popcorn and vodka martinis for dinner. Gets paid: has popcorn and raspberry vodka martinis for dinner."
"What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? -A widow."
"Do you think Hitler got his inspiration from Hansel and Gretel? They did shove a long nosed witch into an oven."
"Jesus said to Moses: ""Come forth and I will grant you eternal life!"" Moses came fifth and he won a toaster."
"When I drink alcohol... Everyone says that I'm alcoholic But When I drink Fanta... No one says I'm fantastic."
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