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Joke of the Day

"Do you think Hitler got his inspiration from Hansel and Gretel? They did shove a long nosed witch into an oven."

"Just finished going through the terms and conditions for iOS 6 with my lawyers. Looks good, guys, I think I'm going to accept."

"Where does a sad chemist find employment? At an apathycary!"

"A moderator is browsing /r/worldnews..."

"Marriage... a relationship between a person who's always right and her husband."

"Decks. Because I like to be outdoors, but not like all on the ground and shit."

"What's yellow and always points to the north? A magnetic banana."

"What do Stephan Harper and pennies have in common? They're both useless in Canada."

"What is brown and bad for teeth? A brick."

"I'd share with you the audio log of Felix Baumgartner's jump again... ...but I'd hate to sound like a broken record."