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Joke of the Day

"Sir, the breadsticks are limitless, not unlimited. You only get one but its potential as a breadstick knows no bounds."

"Why did John Snow get an iPhone? For the watch."

"[Russian Joke] What will the results of the next election be? No one knows! The results were stolen from the Politburo just last night!"

"What is Metal Gear's Snake's secret? There's a Solid, Liquid, and Solidus Snake. It seems they all passed gas."

"I don't know why they call them drug deals... That shit's expensive!"

"It's uncomfortable when the neighbor's kids look like you."

"What's the difference between a bug and an insect? Judging by Table 5's reactions, not a lot."

"I tried to buy a Christmas tree to put in my shed. I couldn't find one anywhere. They were all non - shed."

"I saw your girlfriend kissing another man... - And what she was wearing? -- A White and Gold dress. - Oh she is not, my gf is wearing a black and blue dress"

"DATE IDEA: We stay in our respective homes and watch different shows on Netflix. And also that was a fake phone number I gave you."