107353

Joke of the Day

"Why does Michael J. Fox make the best milkshakes? Because he's very well off and he can afford the finest ingredients."

"Hey Babe Hey babe. Are you a piece of art? Because I'd love to nail you against a wall."

"First thing you do in the school of rock? Rock enroll."

"Trump and Cruz are fighting over whose dick is bigger and whose spouse is a bigger whore. Two more contests Hillary will win."

"Stupid millennials. Always on their phones. Always doing chatsnaps. Always being born into a world where ownership determines everything."

"If a shark is ever attacking me I'm gonna be like where are your parents do they know you act like this"

"A man injures his hand and visits his doctor... ""Doc, will I be able to play the piano now?"" ""Of course! This won't stop a thing."" ""That's good, because I couldn't play worth a damn before!"""

"Nobody heard those terrorist attacks coming... Never forget the tragic events of mime-eleven"

"Did you hear about the Mexican carpet salesman? He was sacked for only selling Underlay!"

"So many people want to hit me for my jokes, they have to stand in a punch line."