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Joke of the Day

"Why isn't North Korea democratic? Because Kim Jung Un doesn't want a public erection"

"Updating your relationship status in public is fine. Updating your relationship problems in public is stupidity."

"Hi, I'm Captain Morgan and this is my uptight brother, J.P."

"Pease don't make fun of dyslexic dwarfs! It's not big and it's not clever!"

"We don't have a chimney but I've assured my children that Santa and anyone else could easily sneak into our home at night."

"FROM: Harvard SUBJ: Your PhD application We are unable to accept you at this time as ""Teaching Squirrels Karate"" is too cool for us."

"WebMD would be more accurate if every search result diagnosed you as a hypochondriac."

"Did Donald Trump make the right choice when picking his running mate? It de-Pence on who you ask."

"When I was ten, my family moved to Downers Grove, Illinois. When I was twelve, I found them."

"So I saw an internet survey the other day... and apparently 99.87% of the population was born on the 1st of January! How very strange!"