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Joke of the Day

"Why didn't the comedian make a tree joke? He wood have, but he decided to leaf it to other branches of the community."

Next Joke
 
"I bought a Cosmo magazine that said ""Best Sex Ever!"" All I got was a bunch of papercuts."
"*decides to go on a diet* *smokes weed* *eats a horse*"
"What do you call a female Israelite? A Shebrew"
"Cop - Have you been drinking? Me - No, just taking my photo with R2D2 here. Cop - Sir that's a fire hydrant."
"Why does everyone find the absolute value of zero so funny? l0l"
"FYI: The .gif file format is pronounced ""jiff"" I know because I joogled it."
"A man is driving and hits a pole. ""I knew I never should've driven in Poland!"""
"Two blonde girls are celebrating at a table... The waiter comes by and asks ""What are you celebrating?"" They say ""We finished this puzzle in only 6 months! And the box says from 2 to 4 years!"""
"Why did the farmer cross the road? He was fucking the chicken."