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Joke of the Day

"Whats the difference between my sex life and my virginity? I have a virginity."

"Oxygen and Potassium went on a date it went OK"

"I want a million followers so I can tweet where I am from anywhere in the world and emergency shit at someone's house."

"Being a single man has to be depressing when you think that even a guy like Hitler had a girlfriend."

"Doctors don't charge for circumcisions, they just take tips."

"ME: [on the phone] Plz come home from work WIFE: Why ME: Theres a spider in the bathroom WIFE: so kill it ME:[whispering] its got my gun"

"Two pedophiles are on a beach One says to the other ""Can you move you're in my sun"""

"What rock group has four men that don't sing? mount rushmore"

"Why hasn't a phone that charges itself just by scrolling the screen ever been invented? What are our scientists doing?"

"What is a gay boxer's favorite drink? Fruity punch"