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Joke of the Day

"Don't you hate it when people attach little steering wheels to their penises? It drives me nuts."

"Did anybody hear about the the peeping Tom who was caught? He was beaten up so badly they sent him to the ICU."

"Why do hippies like corduroy? Because the material is so groovy."

"[Me]: What's a snowman's favorite drink? [Bartender]: idk [Me]: Brrrr-bon lol [Bartender]: ... [Me]: jk snowmen don't drink they aren't real"

"How does an elephant climb a tree? He hides in an acorn and waits for a bird to carry him up."

"What do you call a Chicken with lettuce on its eyes? Chicken Caesar salad."

"*renames my kids South and East, and leaves them on Kanye's doorstep*"

"Why did Dracula go to the orthodontist? He wanted to improve his bite."

"People who carry their dogs around, You know they can walk, right? Theyre real good at it. It's like one of the top known things about dogs"

"Orange Soda I've always dreamt of having a cock as long as a 2 litre bottle of orange soda, and just as wide. It's just Fanta-sea really"