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Joke of the Day

"I've decided to name my penis Napoleon... ...because there's a big misconception that it's short, but it's actually average sized"

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"A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are sitting in the first grade, who has the biggest boobs? The blonde, because she's 18."
"If Willy Wonka manufactured anything other than candy that movie would just be a dark tale of a negligent factory owner murdering children."
"What do you think of Miles Davis? he kind of blew"
"Went to a restaurant last night and the waitress had a black eye. I ordered slow and made sure to speak clearly. Because she obviously doesn't listen."
"What do you call Triple H practicing for a WWE match? Preparation H"
"My suggestion for Reebok's new marketing campaign: ""Nike: Just Do It; Reebok: Do Whatever Feels Right -- We're Not Dictators"""
"""WHY CAN'T YOU BE MORE LIKE THE INTERNET"" - fun thing I yell at my kids"
"If Chuck Norris catches you writing jokes about him, he'll smash your face into the keyjhesreqdzsf"
"Free tip for home invaders: literally everybody with an iPhone6 is out at brunch right now"
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