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Joke of the Day

"My boyfriend and I are Cherokee Indians. He stood me up at our favorite restaurant last night... But it's OK. I don't think we could have stayed anyway, we didn't have a reservation."

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"I let a Jehova's Witness inside the other day and asked him, ""what now?""... He replied, ""I'm not sure, I've never gotten this far before"""
"Give me a T! ""Give me a T."" ""T"" ""Give me a T."" ""T"" ""Oh, fuck it. I'll go to another cafe."""
"You know why matter is fond of using the metric system? Because a lot of it is Pro-ton"
"[makes eye contact with someone through crack in bathroom stall] hey"
"What do horses hope for on election day? A stable economy"
"We have to operate now if the cancer spreads anymore you won't be able to tell the difference between people & food ""Are you nuts?"" Dear God"
"What did Arnold Schwarzenegger say before he went down the mine? I'll be black."
"A real titty bar would only serve milk."
"If Pitbull wasn't famous he'd easily be the creepiest guy in every club he visits."