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Joke of the Day

"Fedoras most likely. Two hats are on a hat rack in a hallway. One says to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on ahead.'"

"Why does everyone hate their elder brother?"

"You could make dinner for a toddler, or you could just cut out the middle man & throw away a plate of food and squirt ketchup on the dog."

"Is it possible for God to be a Cheeto Puffed? Because these taste pretty fucking great. EDIT: I'm getting downvoted but figure this is the reddit algorithm! cheeky cunts"

"I'm not racist but... racist people are."

"Strong people don't put others down: They lift them up and slam them on the ground for maximum damage."

"Why doesn't Santa hitch his sleigh to a pig? Pigs don't have red noses."

"If I applied for a job at the Vatican & they asked for my references I'd say, ""Contact Him"" while pointing up. HOW COULD I NOT GET THE JOB."

"What is The Rock going to name his Daughter? Pebbles!"

"Everything Must Go? You should have had that attitude before going out of business."