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Joke of the Day
"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was out-standing in his field."
Next Joke
"I asked Roy Hodgson if he would consider 4-4-2 next week. He said, ""No, we'll probably go 7-4-7 it's wider and offers more leg room."""
"What's Irish and stays on your back porch all year? Patty O'Furniture"
"At the South Pole by Anne Tarctic"
"As a kid I wanted to be a tree surgeon... but the sight of sap makes me faint"
"Surround yourself with people that can't handle their alcohol, so you can drink theirs after they pass out."
"One liners Come on /r/jokes, what are your favourite one liners, here's mine: I will not sleep until I find a cure for my insomnia!"
"Sleep tight! Your brain is a billion times more complex than your laptop. And laptops break all the time."
"My study buddies, Reese and Shey. Aren't they beautiful? [=)](http://i.imgur.com/K4L0fXJ.jpg)"
"ATTENTION: upon further consideration I am once again pushing back the debut of my summer beach bod. Thank you for your patience."