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Joke of the Day
"Owls would be so much cooler if they could also say 'are you'"
Next Joke
"[gazes up at moons] [that's right in this tweet there's several moons] [girl kisses me] [that's right in this tweet I am not human garbage]"
"Relationships are like algebra. Do you ever look at your x and wonder y?"
"Who farted?"
"What did the man say while holding a square clock? I'm holding Time Square!"
"First, there was Planking, then Owling and Milking, now there's Harlem Shaking. If the next trend could be Thinking, that would be great."
"Me: How many legs does the dog have? 4 y.o: Five Me: There's something wrong with your counting. 4: There's something wrong with the dog."
"I was in a serious relationship once. We never even smiled."
"What do catholic body builders lift? Their guilt."
"one time i slam dunked a basketball so good we were out of school for a week people just needed time to process"