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Joke of the Day

"I bought an iPod from El Chapo... But now I have to keep jailbreaking it."

"My wife is like a drug to me She ruined my life."

"What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lickalottapus."

"What did God say when he made the first black guy? ...Oops I burned one!"

"Guy stole my bike so I got in a cab & said follow that guy! He said sure, whats his twitter name? We laughed & hi-fived & I need a new bike"

"A man goes to the doctor He says he has been having dreams where one night, he is a teepee, and the other night he is a wigwam. Doctor says: ""That's an easy one, you're too tense!"" (Two tents)"

"What's the funniest thing you have heard about US Politics? Donald Trump, President of the United States of America"

"Sorry I used your baby's bald head as a lipstick blotter."

"Something so sad. A can of Coke getting crushed. It is soda pressing."

"An Egg and a Chicken were having sex... But which came first? - Took this title from someone but changed the punchline."