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Joke of the Day

"Win a Canadian marathon by putting a door just before the finish line and having them all wait for you to go through first."

"Parent/Child conversation tweets are always so cute & sweet! Thought I'd try one: 18: Can I borrow the car? Me: No Wasn't that adorable?!"

"How many redditors does it take to change a lightbulb? Hold on, I'll ask"

"What do you call it when whales form a band. An Orcastra."

"What did Ferris Bueller do after he graduated high school? He went to Europe to study a-Broderick"

"Just tried to cook something from scratch and ended up summoning a demon."

"Yo mama's so fat.. ..that she takes a selfie in panorama"

"What has got two legs and bleeds? Half a dog!"

"I texted my girl saying who sang ""Party Rock Anthem"". She replied ""LMFAO"". I don't get what's so fucking funny?"

"Mary had a little sheep and with the sheep she went to sleep. The sheep turned out to be a ram so Mary had a little lamb."