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Joke of the Day

"Going to a wedding today: Me: Do I look ok boys? 6: You look fine. 9: You look wow. Clearly I have work to do with the little one."

"I just found out Nicki Minaj isn't animated!"

"Doc, I can't stop singing... ""Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'."" He said: ""That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."" ""Is it common?"" I asked. He replied, ""It's not unusual."""

"If you can't remember my name, just say 'donuts'. I'll turn around and look."

"when it's april 2nd and she still pregnant"

"What type of condoms does Ronald McDonald use? McRibbed"

"A guy is about to die Guy: How much time do I have left, doctor? Doctor: 10 Guy: 10 what?! 10 days, 10 months, 10 years? Doctor: 9...8...7...6...5..."

"What wine pairs best with this bomb-ass Nokia ringtone"

"What do aliens use to buy their coffee? starbucks"

"Justin Bieber is coming out with an 'Unplugged album'? I hope it's the microphone that they unplug."