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Joke of the Day
"I viewed a house with period features My wife hates it when I call her that"
Next Joke
"I'm at my most Ninja Turtle when I remove a manhole cover & jump into the sewers to avoid making eye contact with someone I know in public."
"My parents decided the key to a successful marriage is going out to a fancy restaurant twice a week. My dad goes out Mondays and my mom goes out Fridays."
"What's the most messed up trap for Santa? A Nicolas Cage."
"What crime did the man get charged with when he killed a black man? Impersonating a police officer."
"What's Bruce Lee's favorite drink? WatAHHH!!"
"i wish i could grow a burrito in my backyard. what if blades of grass were mini burritos. i could make a bed out of mini burritos."
"The thing that makes learning how to use chopsticks so difficult is that the longer you use them, the soggier your cereal gets."
"What is a pirate's favorite letter? You might think it be R... but a true pirate always favors the C."
"Being clean and sober' means I've showered and I'm headed to the liquor store."