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Joke of the Day
"There's a lot of jokes about unemployed people, but none of them work"
Next Joke
"What is a drug? A drug is a substance which when injected into a guinea pig produces a scientific paper."
"[Me]: *slams fork & knife down on table* Not cool, babe. [Wife]: You didn't honestly think there'd be weed in your pot pie, did you?"
"What do nazis eat for breakfast? Luftwaffles"
"The best part of being incompetent to cook and feed myself is that when I travel I am positive I didn't leave the oven on."
"A guy walks into a heavy metal bar. ouch."
"Where do the Greek X-men sleep when camping? Mu-tents"
"Watching my son's soccer game in the cold and rain cuz I'm a good Mom. From my heated car cuz I'm not a total idiot."
"Answer: 9W Question: Does your name begin with a V Herr Wagner?"
"Looks like Southwest Airlines needs to install a GPS Tomtom in the planes so their pilots don't get lost."