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Joke of the Day

"Why do Communists only drink coffee? Because proper tea is theft."

"Which fish can perform operations ? A Sturgeon !"

"FUN PRANK: Bump into Kanye in public, pretend you don't recognize him, and say ""EXCUSE ME ORDINARY CITIZEN"" Then watch how mad he gets."

"God wasn't trying to get Marry pregnant with Jesus. Turns out he was wearing a holey condom."

"How do you recycle a condom? NSFW Turn it inside out and shake the fuck out of it."

"I'm gonna get a neck tattoo that looks exactly like my neck."

"Q: How do you know if there is a drummer at your door? A: The knocking always speeds up."

"My boss told me, ""Dress for the job you want, not the job you have."". I'm currently sitting in a disciplinary meeting wearing my batman costume!"

"A woman walks into a beauty salon and asks the beautician, can you make me look like Kim Kardashian? Beautician says: you want me to put a black cock in your mouth?"

"How many tickles does it take to make a squid laugh? Ten-tickles."