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Joke of the Day

"When robots take over, information will be measured in terrorbytes. Just something I came up with =)"

"family member: what are you doing with your life? me: it's a surprise"

"What do you call a dog on the beach? Sandy Claws Merry Christmas"

"Bank ads make me want to hide my money under my mattress. They also make me want to acquire some money for hiding, but that's a side issue."

"What should you know before you teach your dog a new trick? You should know more than your dog."

"[dentist chair] how's school? *I start talking, dentist notices his hand isn't in my mouth* oh sorry *puts hand in my mouth* how's school?"

"The white Xbox One S was just announced. Of course it's 40% smaller than the black one."

"I don't get what's up with Black Friday. All Fridays matter, guys."

"I like to push the ""stop time"" button on the microwave and walk around in slow motion until my wife calls me an idiot."

"Those who say there is no such thing as a stupid question have obviously never worked in tech support..;)"