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Joke of the Day

"Other silverware probably hates the large spoon that wears skinny jeans, Keds, and thick rimmed glasses. Nobody likes a hipstirrer."

"When a cashier thanks you for your purchase, unsettle them by looking deep in their eyes and softly saying, ""Anything for a friend."""

"My wife removed the ""G"" key from our keyboard at home so I could appreciate the frustration associated with not hitting the spot."

"What does a cock and a Rubik's Cube have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets. Repost, forgot to proofread ""What's does a dick and a Rubiks Cube have in common?"" From /r/Jokes"

"if you love something, set it free. If it immediately bites your throat and drags you up a tree, you love a leopard and should try to escape"

"What does a lingerie store and a guitar store have in common? They both sell G-strings"

"What did Jose name his son? Hose B"

"I found a hole in my trainer that's big enough to put my finger through. One formal complaint from her, and I'm now banned from the gym"

"Apparently they're making a porno opera based on the music of Muse They're calling it 'Supermassive Black Hole'"

"If I went to the capitol of South Korea with my Australian girlfriend Would that make her my Seoul-Mate?"