103813

Joke of the Day

"I bought some expired gummy bears today. They tasted Haribo-l."

"Top-down is the right way to wash just about anything... ...but apparently not convertibles."

"I remember the face of every person who doesn't say ""thank you"" when I hold open the door for them."

"I saw a midget in a KKK outfit today I think he is a little racist."

"My eyes physically can't roll any higher up into my skull to show you how annoying you are."

"Cop: Wife shot the husband for bothering her while reading a book Sargent: You arrested her? C: No S: Why? C: She's not done with the book"

"Do you have something against black people?!?!!? Yes, an alarm system."

"Why was the physicist being so careful not to insult his colleague's choice of generalized coordinates and momentum? He was just minding his Ps and Qs."

"When I masturbate at home... I'm at homecoming."

"Have you heard the joke about what's in the egg Sorry, you wouldn't find it funny it's more of an inside yolk."