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Joke of the Day
"What's the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? Depth perception."
Next Joke
"What was the physicist's favorite football team? The Houston Eulers."
"What do you call Atheism? A non-prophet organization."
"What do a cue ball and a Mexican have in common? The harder you hit 'em, the more english they pick up."
"Finally got the ""Josh Duggar is good"" neck tattoo I've wanted for years, now let me just read today's news as I take a large sip of water..."
"I'm going to make a movie about the raid to steal Osama Bin Laden's porn stash. 'Zero-Dick-Thirty'."
"Sorry I'm late, I was staring at a picture of the Ninja Turtles for an hour trying to figure out why they always wear belts with no pants."
"I'm a Buddhist coke head I hope when I'm reincarnated I come back as a donkey, so I can grind my teeth all day."
"I'm pretty sure our nanny's grandmother has died like seven times now......"
"Why is the all-lisp percussion section so quiet? Because thimbles aren't very loud."