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Joke of the Day
"I'm a social person. I'm friends with 25 letters of the alphabet. I don't know why."
Next Joke
"There is a 'you can kill them if you catch them within a minute' rule on people who wake you up. EVERYONE knows that. *sharpening knife*"
"I'm far too cute to only have one ex-husband."
"COP: drop the gun CRIMINAL: no COP: [flipping through police handbook, whispers to partner] it doesnt say what to do if he says no"
"CUSTOMER: Can you make a pig cooler? WAITER: Sure spray him with a hose."
"10 reasons why doctors use defibrillators... Number 4 will shock you!"
"I wouldn't be mad. And the Lord said unto John ""Come forth and receive eternal life"". But John came fifth and won a toaster."
"Why is Shield Commander Nck Fury upset With another eye missing he can't see a thing. He has officially become *Removes sunglasses Blind Fury"
"A guy walks into a bar and says 'ouch' Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks"
"What did one little lesbian frog say to the other? ""We really do taste like chicken!"""