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Joke of the Day

"Its wrong that priests have to live a life of forced celibacy . They should get married and let celibacy come upon them the usual way."

"Our topic today: Should we legalize monster trucks? We'll speak to monster truck expert Kevin, age 8. He believes they are ""cool and big."""

"Mickey and Minnie Mouse go to divorce court The judge says to Mickey, ""Mickey! You say your wife is crazy."" Mickey replies, ""No I didn't, I said she was fucking Goofy!"""

"how do you get a cat to say like a chicken freeze it and bang it against the table and it says: gog gog gog"

"So, a florist gave me the wrong flowers. I think they're called oopsie daisies."

"A man walking into a bar and says, ""I'll have ten times more beers than your next biggest drinker"" The bartender replied, ""Now that's an order of magnitude!"""

"What sound does a grape make when you step on it? Just a little wine"

"So a guy came into a bar... No... wait, it was a horse. So a guy came into a horse..."

"Why did the Mexican take Xanax? To control Hispanic attacks"

"yo momma so fat her shadow engulfs all of manhattan"