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Joke of the Day

"It's weird how in England the passenger drives the car"

"Saw a bug crawling on my arm and my reaction can only be described as ""grabbing for swirling dollars inside a plexiglas Cash Cube."""

"After buying toilet paper at Walgreens, the cashier said, ""you'll need your receipt."" I don't think I've ever been this scared in my life..."

"A homeless man told me this one. (Kinda NSFW) Why do women have two pairs of lips? One to bitch with, and one to apologize with."

"Put on sunglasses. Now run past a crowd of people with your index finger on your ear screaming ""SNIPER HAS BEEN SPOTTED SIR"""

"I once had a llama."

"[HIGHLY OFFENSIVE] TRANSGENDER MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE"

"See those guys? They apply ordinary grammatical structure and natural flow of speech, rather than rhythmic structure. They're real prose."

"What happens when you provoke an angry redhead? Ginger snaps."

"Monica Lewinsky will not be voting for Hillary.. The last Clinton presidency left a bad taste in her mouth."