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Joke of the Day
"Me: how old is your daughter? Person: she's 31 months Me: ok but like how old in minutes?"
Next Joke
"Why can't I think of a word that means something really good or really bad depending on how you use it in a sentence? Fuck!"
"Shout out to metaphors. Without you there would only be like four songs."
"you really have to admire brits who voted to leave They were so worried about immigrants ruining their economy than they preempted it by doing it themselves."
"What do you call a 5 year old kid with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor All they wanted was books but instead they got magazines"
"What's a bicyclists favorite letter? A! (hands raised up)"
"Why did the farmer give the pony a cough drop He was a little hoarse."
"Let's vote the pool water off that celebrity diving show."
"Ever heard of a sex position called a 71? Its a 69, and each partner puts a finger up their partners butt!"
"[nsfw] What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees."