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Joke of the Day
"*waits for a sign* *dead bird falls from sky* *waits for another, better sign*"
Next Joke
"I hate every child in a commercial."
"Relax lady, you can quit giving me dirty evil looks. I don't want my own husband, so I sure as hell don't want yours."
"I asked a female moderator why I couldn't post images on r/jokes... ""I have a boyfriend!"""
"What's the difference between a Chinese man and a lobster under a bus? Nothing. They're both crustacians."
"You know you're hung over when people recognize you but they think you're E.T."
"If you're American, when are you not American? When European. Or when you're Russian. Any more? :)"
"Revenge is a dish best served with anchovies. Seriously, it hides the taste of cyanide"
"The other night I went out on a blind date Well it didn't start out that way, she had mace."
"What can you find between the toes of the African elephant? Slow Africans."