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Joke of the Day

"What is it called when a thief steals a purse, runs into the street, then gets run over? *Car*ma"

"I wanted to bake a cake from scratch, but I'm out of scratch."

"What do you get if you mix..... Mexicans with Samoans? Some mo Mexicans!"

"Apparently saying, ""You mad, bro?"" is frowned upon if you work in customer service."

"""Objection your honor, the defense is badg-"" BADGERING THE WITNESS! JINX! You can't talk. *Judge gives a respectful nod* ""Case dismissed."""

"How many non-sequiturs does it take to change a light bulb? Yes"

"What is Batman's favourite hair product? Conditioner Gordon."

"There's a petition urging Bill Cosby to change his name to Cuz Billbe Cuz Bill be a rapist, of course ..."

"An angry woman can pack everything she owns in an hour, but it will take her a week to pack for vacation? Women..."

"Why didn't the Seahawks give the ball to Marshawn Lynch? They couldn't fined him."