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Joke of the Day

"I know you didn't sneeze. I said ""God bless you"" because your baby is ugly."

"Why are Asians such bad drivers? Because you can blind them with dental floss"

"My coworker broke his second windshield today. I offered him my apple... ...because windows keep crashing on him."

"Why isn't the guy who wrote ""Danger Zone"" and the Saved by the Bell theme very active on social media? He forgot his Loggins"

"#NoMore All of these NoMore commercials make me want to punch my wife"

"How do you make the king leer? Put the queen in a bikini! (From krusty the klown)"

"Q: What do outlaws eat with their milk? A: Crookies."

"The worst form of Alzheimer's is when you walk out of the kitchen and forget to grab a beer."

"What's the difference between a pimple and a Catholic Priest? A pimple waits until you're 13-years-old before coming on your face."

"I totally understand how batteries feel... ...because I'm rarely ever included in things either."