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Joke of the Day
"What does a black lawyer deliver in court? Nigga' pleas"
Next Joke
"The crossing lights in Chuck Norris's home town say ""Die slowly"" and ""die quickly"". They each have a picture of Chuck Norris punching or kicking a pedestrian."
"I just dropped my phone, is everyone okay?!"
"Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes... That way when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes. [Credit Jack Handy, I believe]"
"Mary: My daughter believes in preventative medicine doctor. Doctor: Oh really? Mary: Yes she tries to prevent me from making her take it!"
"What's the difference between illegal and unlawful? One is against the law, the other is a sick bird."
"He who goes to sleep face down... Crack up."
"What did the overbearing mother melon say to her son and his girlfriend? You Cantaloupe."
"A line to use on Polish people You must be a magnetic Pole because I'm attracted to you."
"[turns to date during movie where bank robbers laugh & toss money around motel room] They won't be laughing when it's time to pick it all up"