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Joke of the Day

"Last night I had a dream that I wrote the Lord of the Rings. When I woke up my wife said I had been Tolkien in my sleep..."

"If a tree falls in a forest and nobody is there to hear it... do the other trees laugh at it?"

"What flies around your light at night and can bite off your head ? A tiger moth !"

"I used to think an ocean of soda existed. Turns out it was just Fanta sea."

"today i saw a dog barking at a ball and i thougt, ah yes, good dog. i too curse the very things which bring me joy"

"It's the year 2057, humans are shaped like candy canes from years of looking down at their phones. Striped-clothing is always in fashion."

"Why was Jon Snow so successful at basketball? he knew where to put it.."

"Reading about how much Daniel Craig hates Bond is like The Pope Visiting Kim Davis all over again."

"A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are all in the 9th Grade. Which one is the sexiest? HAA HAA HAA............... The blonde, because she's the only one who's 18."

"What's the difference... Q: What's the difference between a brown-noser and an ass-kisser? A: Depth Perception"